Sometime life just rears it’s ugly head and kicks you square in the nuts. This was my evening yesterday. Anything that could go wrong did and I didn’t seem to have the right answer to any question. I have just been trying to come to grips with the way my life has turned and to tell the truth, it is very tiring. I have invested so much and changed so much about my life, but it seems the rest of the world around me has gone static. I feel so isolated and alone, even among my friends and my family. I just don’t know if I fit in my own life. I feel like an outsider at times looking in through the windows that are my eyes, on an alien landscape and the mini drama that is my current situation. I really am lost. I don’t know what to do about anything. I know that I need to make things better for myself, but I can’t change those around me. I just hope that I can hang on long enough for everything to get better or that I can know, somehow realize, that it is time for things to change so that I can grow as a person. Ultimately, I hope for the best, but hope is a fleeting thing, at least in my experience. Wouldn’t it be good to have life be everything that you wanted and hoped it would be. I think it would.
Wouldn’t it Be Good from the album “Human Racing” by Nik Kershaw
